Working in Bangalore + An Indian Wedding
Truthfully, India was never at the top of my list for places to travel. I can’t stand spicy food and huge crowds of people overwhelm me. However, when the opportunity to travel to India for work came up and it coincided with the time I get off for the holidays, I knew I had to do the country justice and extend my stay to do a little exploring. I planned this trip very last minute… I booked my flight 2 weeks before leaving and pulled everything together with help of some friends who have lived or traveled in India before. I had also heard wonderful things about Sri Lanka and because it’s so close to Southern India I decided to add it to my itinerary.
Intuit has an office in Bangalore which is where I was heading, I left on December 5th and arrived on December 7th. First I have to add a note about flying business class- it was the most ridiculously luxurious experience ever. They served me champaign when I sat down, they gave me a toiletree kit, the food was actually good, they had a bar on the plane and it had unlimited alcohol - I definitely had my fair share of wine. This made the 16 hour flight a lot more bearable. We had a short layover in Dubai and then arrived in Bangalore very late on Friday night. We arrived to our hotel around 5am on Saturday morning and I slept for a few hours before heading to the lobby for some breakfast and to meet up with my team mates.
Before leaving for India, I had told my team that the one thing I really wanted to do in India was go to an Indian wedding. At breakfast Saturday morning one of my teammates who traveled with me from California told me that his friend was getting married tomorrow (Sunday) and told me I could go. I said I would go if he was going! The wedding was in Hyderabad— which is about an hour flight from Bangalore. We booked our flight to leave the next day around 2pm and come back at 5am on Monday morning.
I rested most of the day on Saturday because I was completely jet lagged. Then I went out for dinner with one of my old team mates who I used to work with but recently switched teams. We went to his home and I got to meet his son and wife. His son who was 11 years old, and had just finished his yoga practice. It’s so interesting because in the states yoga is very much focused on the stretching and sequences of poses. In India it’s a lot more than that - it involves a lot of chanting, meditation and intuition training. He said that kids in the class are able to be blindfolded and can tell what color of a tissue is - wow! This whole practice is used to tune intuition and reduce stress. My old team mate also has a yoga practice and a guru (teacher) that he goes to for practice. At their home they treated me to a tea and a sweet (sweets is what they call desserts in India)- it’s called Kheer and it is usually a rice or noodle cooked in a sweet milk.
I told them about the wedding I was going to the next day and they took me to a store to get some appropriate attire. It’s amazing how beautiful and varied all of the fabrics are in India - there were so many choices I had a hard time choosing. But I picked something out and then we went to dinner at one of their favorite restaurants. My first Indian meal- it was DELICIOUS. We ate family style - I had some broccoli soup, kofka, grilled paneer (paneer is the most popular cheese in India), and some different curries with naan— only one of them was a little too spicy for me.
I learned about the school system in India - at least for my team mates’s son, he goes to school 6 days a week! The school system is very rigorous and stressful. This 11 year old was already studying physics! He was studying for exams that were not even put on by his school - they are exams organized by the country and there are different levels and if you keep passing you take more exams against the smartest kids in the country.
After dinner I went back to my hotel and surprisingly after traveling and being awake all day I couldn’t sleep - I guess this is what jet lag is like! I decided to workout very early in the hotel gym because for the life of me I could not sleep. I rested in the morning before heading to the airport to take off for the wedding! This is where I learned how TERRIBLE traffic is in Bangalore (and the rest of India as well I later learned). I was stuck in a standstill for a least 30 minutes and really thought I might miss my flight. The traffic is so bad in Bangalore - cars, auto-rickshaws, motorcycles, people, buses, trucks — all weaving in and out of lanes, pure chaos. It made the traffic in the Bay Area seem not bad if that gives any reference! The city of Bangalore recently started trying to put up mannequins wearing safety patrol outfits so drivers from a far might think that they are real traffic patrol and start to actually follow the driving laws and traffic signals… I don’t think it’s working.
Anyways, I made it to the airport, had some trouble waiting in line for a while in security- in India there are separate security lines for men and women. The men’s line generally goes quickly and the women’s is always a much longer wait. The reason is that women have to go into this box to be frisked. It’s because since many women wear saris it is possible they can keep things hidden in their saris and the security person (always a woman) has to check _everywhere_ to make sure you’re not hiding anything - I even had my boobs felt up which was an odd experience- I promise not hiding anything in there!
I made it through security and made it on the plane, we arrived in Hyderabad around 3pm and had some chai at the airport. Chai directly translates to tea and is a huge part of Indian culture. People take breaks during the day to go out to a chai stall on the street and it’s usually served in tiny glass cups. So you have a small chai and then go back to work or whatever you were doing. I loveeeeed the chai - it was so tasty! Traditionally made with milk and sugar and so flavorful, this definitely became a part of my daily routine. After our chai stop at the airport we headed to the resort where the wedding was taking place - the wedding started at 8pm. We arrived around 5pm to the hotel. My team mate, Satish, knew the bride because she used to work at Intuit. He also had other friends at the wedding, they were lovely women who took such good care of me and allowed me to stay in their room. I got ready with them and they lent me a bunch of their jewelry and a shall to wear along with he outfit I had bought the day before. They also gave me a bindi- a bindi is the dot that many Indian people wear on their forehead between their eyes. I learned that it is meant to be a reminder to keep your head cool- it is in the place of the first chakra, in the mind and is meant to keep you calm. Although I had to get used to it because I kept thinking I had something on my face and almost brushed it off many times. The other girls were all wearing saris - which is the traditional Indian apparel and is so so beautiful. I was wearing a kurta with I would compare to a tunic, so I also had pants with it. After we were all ready we met up with Satish and headed to the lobby. In the lobby many men were getting turbans put on - some were red and others were pink. I believe that the red ones meant the person was on the grooms side and the pink meant that they were on the bride’s side. It was around 8pm and I was wondering when the festivities would start, but then I learned that they were starting - but only for the groom’s side. I went outside and saw the groom on a horse with a bunch of people holding light up parasols in a parade line and then with a ton of people dancing, a little car with a mini band playing music - it was a moving party! This procession was just for the groom’s side and they were probably in the procession for a few hours! It was fun to watch them celebrate, but I was getting hungry to we went over to the area with the stage and there were a bunch of street food vendors. I tried SO MANY THINGS. My favorite was aloo tikki (aloo = potato, tikki = grilled), it had some tamarind sauce, curd (a yogurt sauce), and pomegranate on it - my new friends learned I didn’t like spicy food so they told the server to leave off some of the spicy sauces. I also had these indo- Chinese veggie meatballs which were tasty, and jellabe - which is a sweet that I would call similar to a funnel cake that is more oily and doesn’t have powdered sugar. Then when they finally made their way to the venue, the groom got off the horse, and women from the bride’s side greeted him and showered him with flower petals, they lit incense around him and chanted some blessings/ prayers. Then the groom went up on a stage and then the bride entered the stage as well. They were both wearing red which is traditional for Indian weddings and the bride looked like she had 100 lbs of gold on her outfit and accessories which seemed impossible to walk in. Then there was a tradition where the bride and groom each get lifted up by their friends and they have to each try to place a lei over the head of each other and I believe it is some sort of good luck/ better luck to the person who gets the lei over the other first - didn’t totally understand this one - it also might be more of a silly thing just a joke but still a ritual. Then more family members went on the stage to start taking photos with the bride and groom, and this was taking a while and the reason is because EVERY PERSON at the wedding started getting in line to get on stage to take photos with the bride and groom - including myself! I went up on stage with Satish and his friends and we took a photos with the bride and groom - and yes I was the only white person at the wedding, so despite my Indian apparel I definitely stood out! But I was so grateful to be there- and I got to meet the bride later and she was so happy that I came to her wedding and thought it was so cool that I wanted to attend an Indian wedding - I was happy to be there! The photo procession went on for probably 90 minutes and then we had dinner around 10:30pm, most of it was a little too spicy for me but I found a few things I really enjoyed. Then there was a wedding intermission - the bride and groom had to change outfits for the wedding ceremony which would start until midnight and would go until probably 4am. Satish recommended we get some rest and then catch the end of the ceremony before we had to go to the airport. So we rested and then got up to catch a taxi and see the end of the ceremony - it was just ending but what happened is that the bride and groom were sitting under what was similar to a gazebo and then there were a lot of incenses/ other things burning/ chanting/ prayers/ blessings/ rituals and I couldn’t really understand any of it. I still don’t understand why it happens so so late at night!
I made it through security and made it on the plane, we arrived in Hyderabad around 3pm and had some chai at the airport. Chai directly translates to tea and is a huge part of Indian culture. People take breaks during the day to go out to a chai stall on the street and it’s usually served in tiny glass cups. So you have a small chai and then go back to work or whatever you were doing. I loveeeeed the chai - it was so tasty! Traditionally made with milk and sugar and so flavorful, this definitely became a part of my daily routine. After our chai stop at the airport we headed to the resort where the wedding was taking place - the wedding started at 8pm. We arrived around 5pm to the hotel. My team mate, Satish, knew the bride because she used to work at Intuit. He also had other friends at the wedding, they were lovely women who took such good care of me and allowed me to stay in their room. I got ready with them and they lent me a bunch of their jewelry and a shall to wear along with he outfit I had bought the day before. They also gave me a bindi- a bindi is the dot that many Indian people wear on their forehead between their eyes. I learned that it is meant to be a reminder to keep your head cool- it is in the place of the first chakra, in the mind and is meant to keep you calm. Although I had to get used to it because I kept thinking I had something on my face and almost brushed it off many times. The other girls were all wearing saris - which is the traditional Indian apparel and is so so beautiful. I was wearing a kurta with I would compare to a tunic, so I also had pants with it. After we were all ready we met up with Satish and headed to the lobby. In the lobby many men were getting turbans put on - some were red and others were pink. I believe that the red ones meant the person was on the grooms side and the pink meant that they were on the bride’s side. It was around 8pm and I was wondering when the festivities would start, but then I learned that they were starting - but only for the groom’s side. I went outside and saw the groom on a horse with a bunch of people holding light up parasols in a parade line and then with a ton of people dancing, a little car with a mini band playing music - it was a moving party! This procession was just for the groom’s side and they were probably in the procession for a few hours! It was fun to watch them celebrate, but I was getting hungry to we went over to the area with the stage and there were a bunch of street food vendors. I tried SO MANY THINGS. My favorite was aloo tikki (aloo = potato, tikki = grilled), it had some tamarind sauce, curd (a yogurt sauce), and pomegranate on it - my new friends learned I didn’t like spicy food so they told the server to leave off some of the spicy sauces. I also had these indo- Chinese veggie meatballs which were tasty, and jellabe - which is a sweet that I would call similar to a funnel cake that is more oily and doesn’t have powdered sugar. Then when they finally made their way to the venue, the groom got off the horse, and women from the bride’s side greeted him and showered him with flower petals, they lit incense around him and chanted some blessings/ prayers. Then the groom went up on a stage and then the bride entered the stage as well. They were both wearing red which is traditional for Indian weddings and the bride looked like she had 100 lbs of gold on her outfit and accessories which seemed impossible to walk in. Then there was a tradition where the bride and groom each get lifted up by their friends and they have to each try to place a lei over the head of each other and I believe it is some sort of good luck/ better luck to the person who gets the lei over the other first - didn’t totally understand this one - it also might be more of a silly thing just a joke but still a ritual. Then more family members went on the stage to start taking photos with the bride and groom, and this was taking a while and the reason is because EVERY PERSON at the wedding started getting in line to get on stage to take photos with the bride and groom - including myself! I went up on stage with Satish and his friends and we took a photos with the bride and groom - and yes I was the only white person at the wedding, so despite my Indian apparel I definitely stood out! But I was so grateful to be there- and I got to meet the bride later and she was so happy that I came to her wedding and thought it was so cool that I wanted to attend an Indian wedding - I was happy to be there! The photo procession went on for probably 90 minutes and then we had dinner around 10:30pm, most of it was a little too spicy for me but I found a few things I really enjoyed. Then there was a wedding intermission - the bride and groom had to change outfits for the wedding ceremony which would start until midnight and would go until probably 4am. Satish recommended we get some rest and then catch the end of the ceremony before we had to go to the airport. So we rested and then got up to catch a taxi and see the end of the ceremony - it was just ending but what happened is that the bride and groom were sitting under what was similar to a gazebo and then there were a lot of incenses/ other things burning/ chanting/ prayers/ blessings/ rituals and I couldn’t really understand any of it. I still don’t understand why it happens so so late at night!
We made it to the airport, made it to Bangalore by 6am, the hotel by 8am for a quick shower and the office by 9am - for my first day of work with my team! The work week was real good- it’s so nice to get face time with the people I have morning and night calls with so frequently — and it’s amazing how much you can get done and how productive you can be when you’re in the same room as people.
The office is in an eco-park, which is a gated area with a bunch of different tech companies, and a food court with places like Starbucks, Baskin robins, and other Indian chain restaurants or chai shops. It was fascinating to go from the extremely traffic-y, dusty, bustling, trashed streets of Bangalore into this clean utopia of green grass and big beautiful buildings. And it was right next to each other - the poverty next to the tech hub, so fascinating. Bangalore is the Silicon Valley of India, so there are many of these eco-parks or tech-parks. We were walking distance from the office so we usually would walk there- which included having to cross a street - this would have been quite the adventure but the city recently installed a foot bridge so we could cross over the street. The few times I had to cross a street I would hold on to the backpack of my co-worker, close my eyes and hope I didn’t get hit by a car - it was true chaos. But the average speed on the streets was like 10km/hr so people aren’t moving all too fast - you just gotta push your way through.
We spent our evenings at dinners, went to Toast & Tonic, The Big Brewski, and Bombay Brasserie. We had an Indian breakfast at our hotel each morning. I had a lassi everyday - and I tried many flavors! I had plain sweet lassi, mango, strawberry, and banana. I said I wanted to open a lassi shop in SF! Lassi is a yogurt drink - like a smoothie but thinner. I tried many foods over the week- the main food groups are carbs and curries. There are lots of different breads - dosas (thin and crepe-like, more popular for breakfast), chapatti, paratha, naan, roti, Udupi…and probably many more. Also lots of rice. You would then dip the bread or rice in curry- lots of different types of curries, I preferred the not spicy ones! Also lots of Dahl - which is a lentil dish that I enjoyed. Chutneys also accompanied the carbs sometimes - I enjoyed the coconut chutney but the others - a red one and a green one- were too spicy for me. I also had lots of sweets - they usually accompany most meals. Indian food is eaten with your hands - but I generally used a fork, unless I was dipping the bread. So it’s common at all restaurants for there to be sinks nearby, or even in the Intuit cafeteria there are sinks there. Everyone washes their hands before and after they eat, because they are eating with their hands and curry is very messy! Also, at the end of the meal you will see a bowl of fennel at all restaurants and in the Intuit cafe. Fennel is known as a digestive in Ayurvedic medicine so you eat some - either plain or coated in sugar - after each meal to help you digest.
One night we tried going to a bar but when we got there it was closed…the reason? It was an Election Day and in that district they were counting the ballots so they didn’t want anyone drinking and counting the ballots so no one was allowed to sell alcohol in that area. Alcohol is interesting in India - many people don’t drink because of religious, cultural or family reasons. I brought a bottle of Napa wine for the team in India but apparently alcohol isn’t allowed in the office there!! We have a fridge full of beer right next to my desk in the Mountain View office!
On our last night we wanted to go out dancing, so we were trying to get an uber but Ubers take forever (like 30 minutes on average to pick you up) - because of traffic was is so bad and the demand is much higher than the supply. That brings me to the amount of people - India is overpopulated. This was a bit overwhelming for me- there are just so many people - everywhere! Additionally because of this there is so much labor and labor is so cheap. For example, it’s very common for a lot of people to have maids that clean their home and cook their food. There are a lot of people who control traffic, a lot of bathroom attendants. We went bowling as a team one day and we had a bowling attendant who gave us tips when we were bowling and cheered when we did well.
Back to our night out dancing - we tried for an hour but could not get an Uber, so instead we hailed a couple of auto-rickshaws. They are kind of like go-carts but they are all licensed vehicles, you can even order them on uber. You can also order a motorcycle pick-up on uber.
We made it to the restaurant/ club, we had dinner and some drinks and then we danced - and my luck, it was Bollywood night! I was the only white person in the entire club and it was packed! My team taught me a couple of Bollywood moves and we danced the night away.- it was a blast.
Saturday, I went hiking with some people on my team. We did two hikes - one at Nandi Hills, which ended up being super foggy so we couldn’t see much, but it was still beautiful up there and we wandered through many gardens. We got to the top by around 7am and I could not believe how crowded it was - and all Indian tourists. So many people!! And there is a ton of domestic tourism in India, so you don’t see many foreigners in many of the places. We stopped at a great Paratha shop after that hike which had amazing paratha and mango lassi! Then we did another hike in Avalabeta - this one was less crowded and less foggy so I enjoyed it a bit more. The views were beautiful and there were lots of monkeys along the trail. After the hike, I went to the mall with my Indian team mate because I had to buy sunglasses since I left mine in SF! We also stopped by this food court and I got to sample a bunch of sweets! Cashew sweets are very popular, but one of my favorites was this fried bread in like a sweetened condensed milk - too good. They we got chai at a chai stall and walked around the city a little bit - stopping for a coconut water along the way. I drank a ton of coconut water in India, you stop on the side of the road and someone is selling coconuts, so for less than 1USD you ask for a coconut and they take a big sword to it and chop the top off, then you drink the coconut water, then you finish it and give them the coconut, then they cut it in half, then they cut a small piece off the side and you use that as a the spoon to scrape the tender coconut in the inside of the coconut out to eat!
I spent the night packing up and ordering room service, I had a 4am flight to Sri Lanka to catch so I enjoyed the last bits of Bangalore and caught a couple hours of sleep before taking off.
